These instances of folly relieved Mary, in some degree reconciled her
to herself added fuel to the devouring flame--and silenced something
like a pang, which reason and conscience made her feel, when she
reflected, that it is the office of Religion to reconcile us to the
seemingly hard dispensations of providence; and that no inclination,
however strong, should oblige us to desert the post assigned us, or
force us to forget that virtue should be an active principle; and that
the most desirable station, is the one that exercises our faculties,
refines our affections, and enables us to be useful.
One reflection continually wounded her repose; she feared not poverty;
her wants were few; but in giving up a fortune, she gave up the power of
comforting the miserable, and making the sad heart sing for joy.
Heaven had endowed her with uncommon humanity, to render her one of His
benevolent agents, a messenger of peace; and should she attend to her
own inclinations?
These suggestions, though they could not subdue a violent passion,
increased her misery.
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