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Shakespeare, William

"Twelfth Night"


SIR ANDREW Wherefore, sweet-heart? what's your metaphor?
MARIA It's dry, sir.
SIR ANDREW Why, I think so: I am not such an ass but I can
keep my hand dry. But what's your jest?
MARIA A dry jest, sir.
SIR ANDREW Are you full of them?
MARIA Ay, sir, I have them at my fingers' ends: marry,
now I let go your hand, I am barren.
[Exit]
SIR TOBY BELCH O knight thou lackest a cup of canary: when did I
see thee so put down?
SIR ANDREW Never in your life, I think; unless you see canary
put me down. Methinks sometimes I have no more wit
than a Christian or an ordinary man has: but I am a
great eater of beef and I believe that does harm to my wit.
SIR TOBY BELCH No question.
SIR ANDREW An I thought that, I'ld forswear it. I'll ride home
to-morrow, Sir Toby.
SIR TOBY BELCH Pourquoi, my dear knight?
SIR ANDREW What is 'Pourquoi'? do or not do? I would I had
bestowed that time in the tongues that I have in
fencing, dancing and bear-baiting: O, had I but
followed the arts!
SIR TOBY BELCH Then hadst thou had an excellent head of hair.
SIR ANDREW Why, would that have mended my hair?
SIR TOBY BELCH Past question; for thou seest it will not curl by nature.


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