Artist. Some men might be shy of mentioning it; I never was shy
in my life and I mention it right and left everywhere--the whole
case, just as it happened, except the names. Catch me ever
committing myself to mentioning names! Mum's the word, sir, with
yours to command, Thomas Boxsious."
"As you mention 'the case' everywhere," said I, "perhaps you
would not be offended with me if I told you I should like to hear
it?"
"Man alive! haven't I told you already that I can't be offended?
And didn't I say a moment ago that I was proud of the case? I'll
tell you, Mr. Artist--but stop! I've got the interests of the
Town Council to look after in this business. Can you paint as
well when I'm talking as when I'm not? Don't sneer, sir; you're
not wanted to sneer--you're wanted to give an answer--yes or no?"
"Yes, then," I replied, in his own sharp way. "I can always paint
the better when I am hearing an interesting story."
"What do you mean by talking about a story? I'm not going to tell
you a story; I'm going to make a statement. A statement is a
matter of fact, therefore the exact opposite of a story, which is
a matter of fiction. What I am now going to tell you really
happened to me."
I was glad to see that he settled himself quietly in his chair
before he began. His odd manners and language made such an
impression on me at the time, that I think I can repeat his
"statement" now, almost word for word as he addressed it to me.
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