Till then, however close our
attachment, we were, in knowledge of each other's character and
thought, almost as strangers. While her painful timidity had in some
degree worn off, her anxious and watchful deference was even more
marked than before. True to the strange ideas derived chiefly from her
training, partly from her own natural character, she was the more
careful to avoid giving the slightest pain or displeasure, as she
ceased to fear that either would be immediately and intentionally
visited upon herself. She evidently thought that on this account there
was the greater danger lest a series of trivial annoyances, unnoticed
at the time, might cool the affection she valued so highly. Diffident
of her own charms, she knew how little hold the women of her race
generally have on the hearts of men after the first fever of passion
has cooled. It was difficult for her to realise that her thoughts or
wishes could truly interest me, that compliance with her inclinations
could be an object, or that I could be seriously bent on teaching her
to speak frankly and openly.
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