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Shaw, George Bernard, 1856-1950

"Getting Married"

'
LEO [rising] You might remember your manners, Sinjon. The lady
comes first. [She goes behind him and stoops to look at the draft
over his shoulder].
HOTCHKISS. To be sure. I beg your pardon. [He alters the draft].
LEO. And you have got only one lady and one gentleman. There
ought to be two gentlemen.
COLLINS. Oh, thats a mere matter of form, maam. Any number of
ladies or gentlemen can be put in.
LEO. Not any number of ladies. Only one lady. Besides, that
creature wasnt a lady.
REGINALD. You shut your head, Leo. This is a general sort of
contract for everybody: it's not your tract.
LEO. Then what use is it to me?
HOTCHKISS. You will get some hints from it for your own contract.
EDITH. I hope there will be no hinting. Let us have the plain
straightforward truth and nothing but the truth.
COLLINS. Yes, yes, miss: it will be all right. Theres nothing
underhand, I assure you. It's a model agreement, as it were.
EDITH [unconvinced] I hope so.
HOTCHKISS. What is the first clause in an agreement, usually? You
know, Mr Alderman.
COLLINS [at a loss] Well, Sir, the Town Clerk always sees to
that. Ive got out of the habit of thinking for myself in these
little matters. Perhaps his lordship knows.


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