COLLINS. I tell you the truth, my lord and ladies and gentlemen:
I dont trust my judgment on this subject. Theres a certain lady
that I always consult on delicate points like this. She has a
very exceptional experience, and a wonderful temperament and
instinct in affairs of the heart.
HOTCHKISS. Excuse me, Mr Alderman: I'm a snob; and I warn you
that theres no use consulting anyone who will not advise us
frankly on class lines. Marriage is good enough for the lower
classes: they have facilities for desertion that are denied to
us. What is the social position of this lady?
COLLINS. The highest in the borough, sir. She is the Mayoress.
But you need not stand in awe of her, sir. She is my sister-in-
law. [To the Bishop] Ive often spoken of her to your lady, my
lord. [To Mrs Bridgenorth] Mrs George, maam.
MRS BRIDGENORTH [startled] Do you mean to say, Collins, that Mrs
George is a real person?
COLLINS [equally startled] Didnt you believe in her, maam?
MRS BRIDGENORTH. Never for a moment.
THE BISHOP. We always thought that Mrs George was too good to be
true. I still dont believe in her, Collins. You must produce her
if you are to convince me.
COLLINS [overwhelmed] Well, I'm so taken aback by this that--Well
I never!!! Why! shes at the church at this moment, waiting to see
the wedding.
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