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Shaw, George Bernard, 1856-1950

"Getting Married"

[She returns weeping to her seat].
MRS BRIDGENORTH [petting Leo, but speaking to the company at
large] But isnt all this great nonsense? What likelihood is there
of any of us committing a crime?
HOTCHKISS. Oh yes, I assure you. I went into the matter once very
carefully; and I found things I have actually done--things that
everybody does, I imagine--would expose me, if I were found out
and prosecuted, to ten years' penal servitude, two years hard
labor, and the loss of all civil rights. Not counting that I'm a
private trustee, and, like all private trustees, a fraudulent
one. Otherwise, the widow for whom I am trustee would starve
occasionally, and the children get no education. And I'm probably
as honest a man as any here.
THE GENERAL [outraged] Do you imply that I have been guilty of
conduct that would expose me to penal servitude?
HOTCHKISS. I should think it quite likely, but of course I dont
know.
MRS BRIDGENORTH. But bless me! marriage is not a question of law,
is it? Have you children no affection for one another? Surely
thats enough?
HOTCHKISS. If it's enough, why get married?
MRS BRIDGENORTH. Stuff, Sinjon! Of course people must get
married. [Uneasily] Alfred: why dont you say something? Surely
youre not going to let this go on.


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