The whole story was chiefly for my mother's benefit. I wanted her to
love you and be grateful to you. I wanted her to take you to her
heart like a son. I do not care a bit about the other people. I only
told them the story to keep myself in practice. And beside, you know
what the world is. A man's personal worth goes for nothing, it only
cares for the outward signs of success, and that is why I said you
were a celebrated man and had a great future before you. That is no
invention, for I believe it firmly. And I told them that you had
saved my life, because it is true, for life was a burden to me till
I knew you, and you have made it worth living."
"But do you not see into what a degrading position you force me?"
"I hoped you would never hear about it. My intentions were so good.
Our relations to one another must be explained in some way. I wanted
to shield your reputation from these people and shut their mouths."
"You see, my poor Pilar," said Wilhelm sadly, "your excuse is the
bitterest criticism upon our relations. You yourself feel how ugly
the naked truth would look, and try to dress it up before the eyes
of the world. That kind of life cannot go on. We are doomed to
destruction in such an atmosphere of lies.
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